By Clifford Ejenavi
For over a decade and a half, Ebie has lived under the same roof with a man she call her husband, yet her heart still feels like a stranger to his love. Every day, Ebie wake up with tears in her eyes, wondering how she got here, in a marriage that looks perfect from the outside but feels empty within. People say love grows with time, but for Ebie, the more the years pass, the more distant she feel. She try to smile, to act like a devoted wife, but deep inside, she’s still fighting a silent war between her heart and her reality.
This is Ebie story of pain, endurance and the daily struggle to find love again in a marriage that has seems lost its spark.
Ebie story:
15 years in marriage, yet love feels like a stranger in my home. I never imagined that one day, I would look at the man I share a bed with and feel nothing but emptiness. Every night, tears become my silent companion and every morning, I wake up wondering when this heavy feeling will end.
When I got married 15 years ago, it wasn’t love that brought us together, it was pressure. My parents thought he was the perfect man, responsible, hardworking and from a respectable family. Everyone around me kept saying, “Love will grow with time.” I believed them. I prayed for it. But 15 years now, I’m still waiting for that love to bloom.
My husband is not a bad man. He provides, he respects me and he has never raised his hand against me. Yet, something is missing, something deeper than comfort and stability. It’s connection. It’s passion. It’s that feeling of being truly seen and understood.
I’ve tried to make it work. I’ve gone to church programmes, spoken with counselors and even forced myself to act loving, hoping that my heart would catch up with my actions. But instead, I feel trapped between duty and desire. There are days I want to leave, but guilt keeps me. We have children together and I don’t want to destroy their home. So, I stay and cry silently when no one is watching.
Sometimes, I wonder if love really fades or if it was never there in the first place. Maybe I was too young to understand what I wanted. Maybe I married the idea of marriage, not the man himself.
15 years is a long time to keep hoping for feelings that never come. I envy couples who laugh easily, who share genuine affection. I’ve forgotten what it feels like to be held with warmth and desire. My life is full of routines, responsibilities and unspoken sadness.
But I still pray, perhaps not for love to suddenly appear, but for peace in my heart. Because after so many years, I’ve realized that sometimes, survival is the only form of love we can give ourselves.
